Conflict correct answers when 2 interdependent people perceive incompatible goals and interference from each other in achieving their goals -Incompatible: interference of goals/ interference from partner (conflict in goals)
2 Types of Conflict correct answers Overt: disagreement is expressed
Co...
CMN 336 exam 3 || All Answers Are Correct 100%.
Conflict correct answers when 2 interdependent people perceive incompatible goals and
interference from each other in achieving their goals -Incompatible: interference of goals/
interference from partner (conflict in goals)
2 Types of Conflict correct answers Overt: disagreement is expressed
Covert: disagreement is unexpressed, unsaid
Topics in Marital Conflict correct answers (common fights) - fight more than about the mundane
topics- really fighting about power issues in the relationship/gender issues
♣ Household chores
♣ Sex
♣ Money
♣ Childcare
Topics in Parent-Adolescent Conflict correct answers ♣ Most conflict in mundane
• Curfew/Bedtime
• Cleaning Bedroom
• Homework
• Clothes/Grooming
♣ Often about legitimacy of parents' influence
3 conflict strategies correct answers constructive, destructive, and avoidance strategies
Constructive Strategy correct answers ♣ Work together to find a mutually acceptable solution to
the conflict. Focus on points of agreement and avoid getting hostile
♣ Goal: achieve mutually accepted __
• How to fight in a good way
6 Constructive Conflict Behaviors correct answers • Listening: active listening and paraphrasing-
trying to understand the other person's perspective
• Fair Fighting: allow equal time for each view, no one dominates - give equal time for each
view/don't gang up against partner/don't dominate conversation
• Soliciting Disclosure: getting partner's perspective- why are you doing this? Is this my problem
or your problem? - try to get the other person to talk about their opinion/what they feel
o Do it in a non-hostile way/no criticism - ask question in a very hostile way (asking for
criticism)
o In order to understand your partner's perspective, have to solicit to understand
• Supportive Remarks: showing understanding and acceptance
• Acceptance of Responsibility: attributing blame to self or to both - don't accuse immediately-
try to accept responsibility and apologize
• Managing the Environment: preventing emotional flooding - if you see something that you
don't like and you're really mad/ emotional at your partner, try to step back and then have a
conversation (manage environment) when both people are calm and ready to talk about it
, Destructive strategy correct answers ♣ involves personal attacks and a tone of hostility. Focus on
competition and points of disagreement.
♣ Goal: 2 people fighting & end goal is to dominate conversation
3 Destructive Conflict Behaviors correct answers • Gunny sacking: letting the issues build up
over time/ until the "last straw is placed on them" - hide anger & everything is piling up and then
one day you finally can't take it and then have a huge argument
• Kitchen sinking: adding on new issues in one conversation or bring up old fights
• Physically attacking: pushing, shoving, throwing things (can get violent)
Gottman's 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse correct answers (A Model About Destructive Conflict)
Predict divorce after 95% accuracy after listening to a couple discuss a conflict for 5 mins
4 types of behaviors/destructive strategies in a relationship 1. Criticism 2. Contempt 3.
defensiveness 4. stonewalling
Criticism correct answers #1 (Gottman's 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse) attacking a partner's
personality or character EX. "you always talk about yourself and never listen. You're self-
centered and ignorant of my feeling"
o Constructive statement: whenever I try to talk to you I feel like you never listen to me. Can you
give me feedback when I talk to you? - take away the contempt language
o Antidote: complain without blame. Communicate your concern/feeling using "I" statement
♣ EX. I'm feeling left out by our talk tonight, can we please talk about my day?
Contempt correct answers #2 (Gottman's 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse)
♣insulting/psychologically abusing each other
• EX. "I just want to listen to you" "most of the time I already know what your going to say"-
starts mocking her
• EX. "how can you say that to our child? You're such an idiot"
o Antidote: try to build appreciation and respect
♣ EX. I appreciate that you care and discipline our child. But you could have handled that
differently
Defensiveness correct answers #3 (Gottman's 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse)♣ unwillingness to
take responsibility. Hostile humor, sarcasm or mockery
• EX. accuse partner of always watching TV, then other partner says "no you are always
watching TV"
• EX. "it's not my fault that we're always late. It's your fault"
o Antidote: do not blame your partner. Accept responsibility when it's appropriate
Stonewalling correct answers #4 (Gottman's 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse) ♣verbal/nonverbal
withdrawal; "silent treatment"; changing the subject
• EX. silence & no eye-contact
• Antidote: practice physiological self-soothing and talk about ______
Conflict Avoidant (3 types) correct answers ♣ Mutual Avoidance: both partners avoid a topic
• agree to disagree
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