, Table of Contents
Table of Contents............................................................................ 2
Introduction...................................................................................5
Part I: Discipline............................................................................. 6
Ch 1: problems and pain................................................................. 6
Ch 2: delaying gratification..............................................................6
Ch 3: the sins of the father............................................................ 7
Ch 4: problem-solving and time......................................................... 7
Ch 5: Responsibility...................................................................... 7
Ch 6: neuroses and character disorders................................................ 7
Ch 7: escape from freedom............................................................. 7
Ch 8: dedication to reality.............................................................. 7
Ch 9: transference: the outdated map................................................. 7
Ch 10: openness to challenge............................................................ 7
Ch 11: withholding truth................................................................. 8
Ch 12: Balancing.......................................................................... 8
Ch 13: the healthiness of depression................................................... 9
Ch 14: renunciation and rebirth......................................................... 9
Part II: Love................................................................................ 10
Ch 1: love defined...................................................................... 10
Ch 2: falling in ‘love’.................................................................... 10
Ch 3: the myth of romantic love.......................................................10
Ch 4: more about ego boundaries...................................................... 11
Ch 5: dependency....................................................................... 11
Ch 6: cathexis without love............................................................ 12
Ch 7: ‘self-sacrifice’....................................................................12
Ch 8: love is not a feeling..............................................................12
Ch 9: the work of attention............................................................13
Ch 10: the risk of loss................................................................. 14
Ch 11: the risk of independence....................................................... 15
Ch 12: the risk of commitment........................................................ 15
Ch 13: the risk of confrontation...................................................... 16
Ch 14: love is disciplined............................................................... 17
Ch 15: love is separateness............................................................ 19
, Ch 16: love and psychotherapy........................................................ 22
Ch 17: the mystery of love............................................................ 22
Part III: Growth and Religion............................................................. 23
Ch 1: world views and religion......................................................... 23
Ch 2: the religion of science........................................................... 24
Ch 3: the case of kathy................................................................ 24
Ch 4: the case of marcia...............................................................25
Ch 5: the case of theodore............................................................ 25
Ch 6: the baby and the bath water................................................... 25
Ch 7: scientific tunnel vision........................................................... 25
Part IV: Grace.............................................................................. 28
Ch 1: the miracle of health............................................................ 28
Ch 2: the miracle of the unconscious..................................................28
Ch 3: the miracle of serendipity.......................................................29
Ch 4: the definition of grace.......................................................... 29
Ch 5: the miracle of evolution......................................................... 30
Ch 6: the alpha and the omega........................................................ 30
Ch 7: entropy and original sin.......................................................... 30
Ch 8: the problem of evil...............................................................31
Ch 9: the evolution of consciousness.................................................. 31
Ch 10: the nature of power............................................................ 32
Ch 11: grace and mental illness: the myth of Orestes.............................. 33
Ch 12: resistance to grace............................................................. 34
Ch 13: the welcoming of grace.........................................................34
,Introduction
● These are notes on The Road Less Travelled.
○ A summary. But also, a record of personal lessons learnt from the book.
● The new psychology of love, traditional values and spiritual growth
● Discusses:
○ the nature of loving relationships
○ how to recognise true compatibility
○ how to distinguish dependency from love
○ how to become one’s own person
○ how to be a more sensitive parent
● This is my food for the soul.
, Part I: Discipline
● 14 chapters
Ch 1: problems and pain
● Life is difficult.
1. this is a great truth
2. once we truly see this truth, we transcend it.
● with total discipline, we can solve all problems.
● It is uncomfortable to solve life problems.
1. solving life problems evokes uncomfortable feelings in us.
● It is through the pain of confronting and resolving our problems that we learn.
1. Wise people welcome problems & the pain of problems.
● I must suffer through my problems.
● when we teach ourselves discipline, we are teaching ourselves how to suffer
● discipline:
1. the basic set of tools we require to solve life’s problems
2. a system of techniques for dealing constructively with the pain of
problem-solving
3. simple tools
4. to use them: embrace legitimate suffering
5. Delaying gratification
6. accepting responsibility
7. dedication to truth
8. balancing
Ch 2: delaying gratification
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