Inhoudsopgave
Hoofdstuk 1: Inleiding in de communicatie(leer) ................................................................................................... 5
3.2) De axioma’s ................................................................................................................................................. 25
3.2.1) Axioma 1: men kan niet niet-communiceren: ..................................................................................... 25
3.2.2) Axioma 2: Communicatie is geslaagd en heeft een inhouds-en betrekkingsniveau ........................... 25
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3.2.3) Axioma 3: de interpunctie in de communicatie:.................................................................................. 26
3.2.4) Axioma 4: digitale en analoge communicatie: ..................................................................................... 27
3.2.5) De symmetrische en complementaire interactie: ............................................................................... 27
4.1) Inleiding: ...................................................................................................................................................... 28
4.1.1) Luisteren en horen: .............................................................................................................................. 28
4.1.2) Acht tips van Kate Murphy (1985) ....................................................................................................... 28
5.1) Algemeen: de kunst van het vragen stellen: ............................................................................................... 35
5.2) Soorten vragen: ........................................................................................................................................... 35
5.2.1) Hoofdcategorieën: direct of indirect en open of gesloten: ................................................................. 35
5.2.2) Bijcategorieën: ..................................................................................................................................... 36
5.3) Vraagtechnieken bij kinderen: .................................................................................................................... 37
5.3.1) Open en gesloten vragen: .................................................................................................................... 37
5.3.2) Doorvragen: ......................................................................................................................................... 37
5.3.3) Suggestief vragen: ................................................................................................................................ 37
5.3.4) Meervoudig vragen: ............................................................................................................................. 37
5.3.5) Vraag herhalen of verduidelijken: ....................................................................................................... 38
5.3.6) Antwoord herhalen of samenvatten: .................................................................................................. 38
5.3.7) Samenvattend vragen: ......................................................................................................................... 38
Hoofdstuk 6: Feedback en kritiek .......................................................................................................................... 38
6.1) Feedback: .................................................................................................................................................... 38
6.1.1) Inleiding:............................................................................................................................................... 38
5.1.2) Directe feedback: het “smeren” van het gesprek: .............................................................................. 40
5.1.3) Evaluatieve feedback: hoe heb ik het gedaan? ................................................................................... 40
5.1.3.1) Algemeen: ..................................................................................................................................... 40
5.1.3.2) Johari venster (Joe Luft & Harry Ingham) ..................................................................................... 40
5.1.3.3) Het geven van evaluatieve feedback: ........................................................................................... 42
5.1.3.4) Het ontvangen van evaluatieve feedback: ................................................................................... 42
7.2) Lastig gedrag beter begrijpen: .................................................................................................................... 45
7.2.1) Leren over jezelf ................................................................................................................................... 45
7.2.2) Waarom is iemand lastig: mensen en situaties ................................................................................... 47
7.2.2.1) Situaties ........................................................................................................................................ 47
7.2.2.2) Mensen: zie pg. 91-92................................................................................................................... 48
7.3) Gesprekstechnieken: ................................................................................................................................... 48
7.3.1) Regie hebben en houden over het gesprek: ........................................................................................ 48
7.3.2) Aanspreken: ......................................................................................................................................... 49
7.3.3) Afstemmen:.......................................................................................................................................... 49
7.3.4) Standpunt herhalen: ............................................................................................................................ 49
7.3.5) De bal terugspelen (of niet) ................................................................................................................. 50
7.3.5.1) De bal terugspelen: ....................................................................................................................... 50
7.3.5.2) De bal niet terugspelen: ............................................................................................................... 50
7.3.6) Het gesprek afsnijden: ......................................................................................................................... 50
7.3.7) Met betrekking tot het onderwerp:..................................................................................................... 50
7.3.7.1) Het onderwerp veranderen .......................................................................................................... 50
7.3.7.2) Aan het onderwerp vasthouden: .................................................................................................. 50
7.3.8) De DESC-methode ................................................................................................................................ 51
7.3.9) Kalmeringstechnieke tijdens een (agressief) gesprek: ........................................................................ 51
8.2) Verschillen tussen assertief, agressief en subassertief ............................................................................... 52
8.3) Praktische aanwijzingen voor assertief gedrag: ......................................................................................... 54
8.3.1) Drie regels voor assertief gedrag: ........................................................................................................ 54
8.3.2) Het gebruik van “ik-boodschappen” .................................................................................................... 54
8.3.3) Grenzen stellen: nee zeggen: ............................................................................................................... 54
8.3.3.1) Denkpatronen die het moeilijk maken om nee te zeggen ........................................................... 55
8.3.3.2) Doorbreek automatische onrealitische gedachten: ..................................................................... 55
8.3.3.3) Weigeren van een verzoek: nee zeggen: ...................................................................................... 55
8.3.4) Conclusie: het ARSEVO-model ............................................................................................................. 56
Hoofdstuk 9: Gesprekken met kinderen ............................................................................................................... 57
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Hoofdstuk 10: Circumplexmodellen in communicatie ......................................................................................... 77
10.1) Inleiding: wat zijn circumplexmodellen? ................................................................................................... 77
10.3) De axenroos van Cuvelier .......................................................................................................................... 85
Hoofdstuk 11: Overtuigen en argumenteren........................................................................................................ 89
11.2) Het geven van een eigen mening: ............................................................................................................. 89
11.2.1) Aspecten weergeven van eigen mening – de opbouw ...................................................................... 89
11.2.1.1) Aspecten weergeven van eigen mening – de presentatie ......................................................... 90
11.3) Overtuigen:................................................................................................................................................ 90
11.3.1) De zes principes ................................................................................................................................. 90
11.3.1.1) De psychologie van overtuigen – Cialdini: Sociaal bewijs .......................................................... 90
11.3.1.2) De psychologie van overtuigen – Cialdini: Sympathie:............................................................... 91
11.3.1.3) De psychologie van overtuigen – Cialdini: wederkerigheid: ...................................................... 91
11.3.1.4) De psychologie van overtuiging – Cialdini: consistentie: ........................................................... 91
11.4) Argumenten “Waarom? Daarom!”: .......................................................................................................... 91
11.4.1) Indicatoren: ........................................................................................................................................ 92
11.4.2) Soorten argumenten: ......................................................................................................................... 92
11.4.2.1) Komen tot een argument ........................................................................................................... 92
11.4.2.2) Sterke argumenten – 3 eisen: ..................................................................................................... 93
11.4.2.3) SEXI Argumenten: ....................................................................................................................... 93
11.4.3) Drogredenen of valse argumenten: ................................................................................................... 93
11.4.3.1) Drogredenen gebruikt door opvoeders ...................................................................................... 93
11.4.3.2) Drogreden gebruikt door opvoedelingen: .................................................................................. 94
11.4.4) Soorten argumentatie:....................................................................................................................... 94
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