Above, I have submitted my yr 9 option exam for Re. I understand that not many might be assessed this task in school, but for those who generally want an in depth letter for pilgrimage to India, I hope you see the one above. Hope this helped :)
Medal: Mission:
Name Aaliyah Shafiq Form 9D
Year 9 Assessment 2 Pilgrimage SAT:
Rupa’s Letter Home.
RE Target Grade: Assessment Grade:
Description Grade 2 Grade 3 Grade 4 Grade 5 Grade 6
I have I have used valid I have used I have used I have used ideas to
Knowledge & organised a ideas in my letter ideas to write a ideas to write write an accurate
Understanding letter with and organised sound and well an accurate and very well
AO1a some main them. I have used organised letter. and well organised letter. I
ideas. I have some key words, I have used key organised have used a wide
used a few such as words letter. I have range of key words
key words, Vrindavan. I have accurately, such used several effectively and have
such as looked at the as Varsana. I key words not used a large
Krishna. I guidelines for have used my effectively and amount of my own
have used the ideas. own ideas, not have used ideas and material
guidelines to just the some of the from outside of the
help me. guidelines. guidelines story using Empathy
using to good effect.
Empathy.
I have I have generally I have described I have shown a I have given a
included some shown how Rupa how Rupa is sound thorough explanation
Application ideas to show is influenced by influenced by explanation of of how Rupa is
how the pilgrimage in the pilgrimage how Rupa is influenced by the
pilgrimage his emotions / his and shown a influenced by pilgrimage and
AO1b influences devotion to comparison the pilgrimage described the
Rupa, such as Hinduism / future between Rupa and described comparison between
his emotions plans. at the start and the Rupa at the start and
or devotion to Or I have end of the comparison end of the journey. I
Hinduism. identified how journey. I have between Rupa have connected
Rupa has included ideas at the start and emotions / devotion
changed between about his end of the to Hinduism / future
the start and the emotions / journey. I have plans showing a
end of the devotion to connected nuanced style.
journey. Hinduism / emotions /
future plans. devotion to
Hinduism /
future plans.
With support I My text shows I My text shows I My text is clear My text is clear and
Communication can use can control my can control my and well very well structured.
and Literacy sentence sentences and sentences and structured. I My account is very
structures and structure. My structure. My can keep the descriptive and
Literacy key words. I SPAG is mostly text is mainly reader’s includes emotions to
SPaG can use accurate. clear and key interest. MY keep the reader’s
SPAG with words are SPAG is interest. MY SPAG is
some effective. My accurate with accurate with few
accuracy. SPAG is occasional errors.
generally errors.
accurate.
- = + - = + - = + - = + - = +
Targets:
Develop a wider range of To include more detail Develop the turning To show more clearly Gather more
religious vocabulary to about the events of the point in the letter, to how Rupa changes information about
describe and explain Rupa’s journey, the places and show how it affects during the journey and Vrindavan to show
(spiritual) journey. the sights Rupa Rupa’s attitude and how his devotion to independent research
engages with. why it causes a Hinduism increases. and Empathy skills to
change in him and his develop my letter to a
future plans. higher grade.
, Pilgrimage Assessment 2 Rupa’s Letter Home: Writing Frame
76 Bank Street,
Croydon
London
WV7 7AYH
Dear Daadee,
I am writing you to regarding my experience in India. I hope all is well
back at home, and I have been thinking about you since I left.
I hope your health is all well and I really miss being with you back at
home. I was also wondering on how the wedding plans are progressing
with Sita. When I am returning to Heathrow Airport at 5:45, I was curious
to know if you were coming to meet there at 6pm for some Chai at
Chaiiwalas? If you cannot make it due to shortage of time for
confirmation if you have any evening plans, please let me know. I want
to come back to your house after as well so I can properly show you the
pictures and videos I have took of the temples that you told me many
Hindi stories about which interested me!
When the day came that I was leaving for India, I honestly was sad
because I didn't want to leave you behind as there might have been no
one to take care of you and Sita because she is unable to come with me.
At first, I felt disappointed when I went to Krishna’s birthplace as it
seemed to be quite plain and simple and then I envied the other pilgrims
as they were more interested in this room when there was simply nothing
here that was appealing but now I realised how much I have changed
since going to India into a person who is trying to be better off
understand my religion from the heart of India..
When I had made it to the Padma-Kunda I saw that a Kunda was a pool of
water which was like a lake. I was first unsure why it was considered holy
or special as it was just water. However, as I travelled through India, I
began to see how important this was for the other pilgrims, so I decided
that I wanted to try and fit in with the other pilgrims. The pilgrim leader
had then gone on to say that it was believed that if you bathed in the
Padma Kunda, you would then understand all the great sacred writing of
India. As some of the people had got in halfway, they had said they had
understood the sacred writings but to me then, I thought this mustn’t be
right. Then when one of the pilgrims went in fully, they had said they
understood everything about God and nothing else. That evening, I was
restless due to the thoughts on my mind that wouldn’t escape on how
this possible in a scientifical way.
Then came the next day, where we had reached the Radha Kunda. By
this time, I was feeling more comfortable to be around the other pilgrims.
I then related to the stories you had told me growing up about the sites
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