Positive associations
Dutch research showed that at age 25, 81% of Dutch youngsters has sexual experience. 90% of young
women and 94% of young men say they enjoy sex. This was a study with 20.500 people at the age 12-
25.
But what is sex?
Wikipedia: Human sexual activity, human sexual practice or human sexual behaviour is
the manner in which humans experience and express their sexuality
Oxford dictionary: Sex = sexual activity, including specifically sexual intercourse
Sexuality = sexual activity
Yourdictionary: Sex = any function or behaviour involved with reproduction
Go Ask Alice: Sex = the birds and the bees. Getting it on
This shows that sex is complex -> there are different associations with sex
How do people have sex?
No sex:
o Asexuality (versus allosexuality) -> 1% of the population -> they have a general lack
of desire for partnered sexual activity
You also have gray sexuality -> that is between asexuality and allosexuality -> they
experience sexual attraction sometimes or not very intensely
o Voluntary celibacy -> these people have a desire to sex, but choose to not have sex ->
anyone that not have sex in the past half year
o Involuntary celibacy (incel) -> you would like to have sex, but you can not get it -> for
example because it’s physical not possible or because you are for a long time in a
hospital
Incel: people that want to have sex, but they are not getting it, so they are angry ->
they think they have a right to have sex
Solitary sexual behaviours
o Sexual fantasy: any mental picture that comes to mind while you’re awake, that
ultimately turns you on
Most common:
Multipartner sex
BDSM: bondage, discipline, dominance, submission, sadism, and
masochism -> it’s about power and control
Novelty, adventure, and variety -> for example have sex on a
different place
o Masturbation -> lower the change of having prostate cancer at men
Partnered sexual behaviours
o Kissing -> in the Netherlands we start with kissing about the age of 16, in America
this is earlier
o Touching
o Manual sex (tribadism)
o Oral sex (fellatio/cunnilingus) -> more than 50% reaches an orgasm through
cunnilingus
o Anal sex (intercourse or anilingus)
o Vaginal intercourse (coitus)
1
,Sex is only sex if all partners consent. If there is no consent, we call it sexual
assault or sexual abuse or rape.
In general, you are not allowed to have sex with someone under the age of 16.
More than 50% of the women in the Netherlands have been sexual abused and
about a quarter had to do with sexual violence.
How do people have coitus?
There are 4 basic positions (most popular/best known):
Man on top, missionary
Woman on top, amazon/cowgirl
From behind, doggystyle
Sideway, spooning
The best way for a women to get a orgasm is through cowgirl or the CAT position (best for clitoral
stimulation).
Less than 20% of the heterosexual couples gets an orgasm at the same time.
How do people define having sex?
In the United States:
Penis in vagina – 95%
Penis in anus – 75%
Oral sex – 30%
Manual sex – 12%
In the Netherlands:
Penis in vagina – 99%
Penis in anus – 93%
Oral sex – 75%
Manual sex – 66%
How do homosexual people define having sex?
What is sex?
Sex is more than just the coitus
Sex is all behaviour that arouses us (via touch, hearing, vision, smell)
Mostly focussed on genitals
Often leads to orgasm
Sex is only sex if all partners consent
2
,The ‘sexual career’ in the Netherlands
3
, HC 2 Sex and culture: the role of religion and science
What is sex?
Sex is more than just the coitus
Sex is all behaviour that arouses us (via touch, hearing, vision, smell)
Mostly focussed on genitals
Often leads to orgasm
Sex is only sex if all partners consent
Former beliefs about sex
For centuries the idea has been that sex is :
Heterosexual penis-vagina coitus
Where the man has an orgasm (woman not necessarily)
Within a monogamous relationship (preferably marriage)
With the aim of reproduction
Why do humans have sex
Biologists will say: the goal of sex is mixing of genes and survival of the species
But that is the result of sex, not the motivation. So why do people have sex?
Procreation: sex for reproduction
Sex is heterosexual coitus, aimed at passing on genes
Recreation: sex for pleasure
Sex is any behaviour – solo or with partner – focused on satisfying sexual desire
Relation: sex to confirm an intimate relationship
Sex is any behaviour with a partner focused on creating or strengthening an emotional bond
But until 2007 it was never actually investigated. A research from 2007 showed that there were 237
reasons that people had sex.
Reasons for sexual intercourse:
I wanted to have a child
It feels good
I wanted to express my love for the person
I was ‘horny’
I wanted to relieve menstrual cramps
I wanted to act out a fantasy
I was bored
And way more reasons
Reasons for sexual intercourse clustered:
Physical:
o I wanted to experience the physical pleasure
o The person had an attractive face/desirable body
o I was curious about sex/my sexual abilities
Goal attainment:
o I wanted to get a raise/job/promotion
o I wanted to burn calories
o I wanted to have a child
Emotional:
4
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