ON HER BLINDNESS – ADAM THORPE
My mother could not bear being blind,
to be honest. One shouldn’t say it. → The opening stanza sets the tone of the poem. It is a
stark statement, moving in its suggestion of deep suffering. Most readers will sympathise deeply.
The speaker’s comment ‘to be honest’ reflects his mother’s own confession of her inability to cope.
As we learn later this is an unexpected confession; her inclination is to project bravery and
stoicism.
One should hide the fact that catastrophic
handicaps are hell; one tends to hear,
publicly from those who bear it
like a Roman, or somehow find joy
in the fight. → This is an interesting comment on society’s insistence that those suffering
disability are, or ‘should be’ brave or stoical or unaffected emotionally. It is also politically correct to
be upbeat and positive about ‘handicaps’, though the reality of living with disability is highly
complex. → But it is interesting that the poet doesn’t use the euphemism, ‘disabled’. The reality is
that not everyone can ‘bear it’ easily. → The simile ‘like a Roman’ provides a rare note of wry
humour.
She turned to me, once,
in a Paris restaurant, still not finding
the food on the plate with her fork,
or not so that it stayed on (try it
in a pitch-black room) and whispered,
“It’s living hell, to be honest Adam. → The speaker expands on this theme. The Paris
restaurant is an ironic setting in which to make her honest confession — the epitome of elegance
and good living, yet she is unable to derive pleasure from life. Her son understands, as indicated
by the statement in the parenthesis. Note that she ‘whispered’ to him, as if this isn’t something that
should be overheard.
If I gave up hope of a cure, I’d bump
myself off.” I don’t recall what I replied,
but it must have been the usual sop,
inadequate: the locked-in son. → Like any other son or daughter in these circumstances it is
difficult to respond to a confession like that; everyone would feel inadequate. → It is ironic that
Thorpe describes himself as ‘locked-in’, when the reader may think that it is his mother who is
‘locked-in’ because of her blindness. → The expression his mother uses — ‘bumped off’ — is
colloquial, an inelegant euphemism that is powerful because it is unexpected from an old woman.
→ The poet, understandably, doesn’t recall his reply because there is no adequate response to this
statement.
She kept her dignity, though, even when
bumping into walls like a dodgem; her sense
of direction did not improve, when cast
inward. “No built-in compass,” as my father
joked → The joke made by the poet’s father matches his mother’s attempts to project the lie that
My mother could not bear being blind,
to be honest. One shouldn’t say it. → The opening stanza sets the tone of the poem. It is a
stark statement, moving in its suggestion of deep suffering. Most readers will sympathise deeply.
The speaker’s comment ‘to be honest’ reflects his mother’s own confession of her inability to cope.
As we learn later this is an unexpected confession; her inclination is to project bravery and
stoicism.
One should hide the fact that catastrophic
handicaps are hell; one tends to hear,
publicly from those who bear it
like a Roman, or somehow find joy
in the fight. → This is an interesting comment on society’s insistence that those suffering
disability are, or ‘should be’ brave or stoical or unaffected emotionally. It is also politically correct to
be upbeat and positive about ‘handicaps’, though the reality of living with disability is highly
complex. → But it is interesting that the poet doesn’t use the euphemism, ‘disabled’. The reality is
that not everyone can ‘bear it’ easily. → The simile ‘like a Roman’ provides a rare note of wry
humour.
She turned to me, once,
in a Paris restaurant, still not finding
the food on the plate with her fork,
or not so that it stayed on (try it
in a pitch-black room) and whispered,
“It’s living hell, to be honest Adam. → The speaker expands on this theme. The Paris
restaurant is an ironic setting in which to make her honest confession — the epitome of elegance
and good living, yet she is unable to derive pleasure from life. Her son understands, as indicated
by the statement in the parenthesis. Note that she ‘whispered’ to him, as if this isn’t something that
should be overheard.
If I gave up hope of a cure, I’d bump
myself off.” I don’t recall what I replied,
but it must have been the usual sop,
inadequate: the locked-in son. → Like any other son or daughter in these circumstances it is
difficult to respond to a confession like that; everyone would feel inadequate. → It is ironic that
Thorpe describes himself as ‘locked-in’, when the reader may think that it is his mother who is
‘locked-in’ because of her blindness. → The expression his mother uses — ‘bumped off’ — is
colloquial, an inelegant euphemism that is powerful because it is unexpected from an old woman.
→ The poet, understandably, doesn’t recall his reply because there is no adequate response to this
statement.
She kept her dignity, though, even when
bumping into walls like a dodgem; her sense
of direction did not improve, when cast
inward. “No built-in compass,” as my father
joked → The joke made by the poet’s father matches his mother’s attempts to project the lie that
