Madison Charles
To what extent is duty the most important part of a sexual relationship? Discuss
Emmanual Kant in his ethical theory Kantianism stressed the importance of doing one's duty in moral
decision making which is understood through the use of pure practical reason. Although other theories
like Natural Law would argue that the most important part of sexual relationship is reproduction since it
is fulfilling the telos of humans or with the introduction to sexual autonomy and contraception, that it is,
like theories such as Situation Ethics and utilitarianism suggest, pleasure, having duty as the most
important part of a sexual relationship emphasises mutual respect which it the most important part of a
sexual relationship.
Duty is part of how Kant considered we should make moral decisions; it is what we ought to do. Though
it can be argued that your ‘duty’ is subjective depending on the person, Kant argues that everyone
would come to the same conclusion of what their duty is in a certain situation firstly through their use of
pure practical reason and secondly through their natural inclination. Doing the right thing in the context
of sexual ethics is extremely important. It can be argued that Kant’s call for emotions to be separate
from moral decision making can make sexual relationships cold and impersonal, a sexual relationship
based purely on emotions can lead to harm and a disregard for the other person’s autonomy. Kant
supports his notion of duty through his categorical imperatives. His imperative of universalizability and
the formula of the end in itself stress the importance of respect which is essential for a happy
relationship. Universalizability suggests you should envision every action you do as if you would be
happy if everyone were to follow it. Therefore, using your partner to fulfil only your sexual desires is not
an option because you would not be happy if someone did it to you. Equally, the formula of the end in
itself explicitly states that you should not use someone as a means to an end and therefore treating
someone as a means to your own sexual fulfilment is explicitly forbidden.
Aquinas, in favour of Natural Law, would argue that the ability to reproduce is the most important part
of a sexual relationship since it fulfils humanity’s telos to reproduce. However, this Roman Catholic
notion is out of date with the modern inventions of contraception and the ideological shift of second
wave feminism which saw women advocate for more sexual autonomy. In addition, this idea suggests
that sexual relationships should exclude couples outside the age of fertility, who are infertile, and those
who are homosexual. It can also be seen as reductionist since it reduces humanity’s purpose to solely
reproduction and ignores the pleasurable aspect of sex. Utilitarianism, however, does value pleasure as
the most important factor of a sexual relationship since, according to Bentham, “nature has put
mankind under the guidance of two sovereign masters, pain and pleasure” and therefore most humans
live their life according to pain and pleasure. Though it may be true that this is how most people live
their lives, it does not mean we ought to live our lives like this. This is reminiscent of David Hume’s
is/ought fallacy where he suggests that theories like this make the jump from what is (we live our lives
focused on pain and pleasure) to what ought to be (therefore we should live our lives according to pain
and pleasure). As Thomas Carlyre said, utilitarianism is “pig philosophy” and “based on the swinish
pleasure of the multitude”. Having a quantitative theory like Bentham’s act utilitarianism allows for a lot
of harm to take place, such as group rape or the uploading of child pornography to porn sites, or even
coercing someone into sex. Most would agree that this is unacceptable and horrific. Although Mill
attempts to amend the flaws in Bentham’s theory with the introduction of his Harm Principle and the
notion of negative liberty, these fall short too. The harm principle does not account for emotional pain