1. The novel opens with a curse word, uttered in frustration by Mariam’s mother,
when Mariam breaks a treasured heirloom. What does Mariam’s memory of this
suggest about her sense of herself and her relationship with her mother? How does
this opening set the tone for the novel?
Mariam feels like she’s not wanted by her mom and that her mom would have been
better off without Mariam. Every time Mariam does something her mom disapproves
of, she calls her harami which means bastard and that gives Mariam the feeling her
mom never wanted Mariam or the life she has now, because she got Mariam. It sets
the tone for the novel, because later in the book when Laila is pregnant, Mariam has
a hard time getting used to Aziza and being a mom, because she didn’t have a good
role model. It also sets the tone, because it explains really well how childhood was for
Mariam and why she is how she is later in the book.
2. Based on Nana’s and Mariam’s experiences, what can you infer about the lives of
women in Afghanistan in the sixties? Why does Nana forbid Mariam to go to school?
What does Nana want for her and Mariam? Is Nana’s goal realistic?
For starters the lives of women are less worthy than a mans life. The man goes to
college, educates himself and gets a job to provide for his wife and children. Women
cook and clean the house and that is how things were back then.
Nana does not believe that school is any use to Mariam or women in Afghanistan at
all. Women are supposed to ‘endure’ and they don’t teach that in school so what can
you possibly learn there? She doesn’t want Mariam to be gone, because then she will
be all alone in the kolba and then there is not really something for her in life
anymore.
Nana wants that she and Mariam can grow old together and stay together in the
kolba. But that is not realistic, because nana is older and Mariam will eventually be
on her own.
3. Jalil, Mariam’s father, is a complex character. Does he love his daughter? How does
he show his love? How does he show that he does not fully recognize her as his
daughter? Why does he treat her as he does?
It seems like he loves her, that is why he comes every Thursday and he makes her
feel loved, which she lacked of from her mother. He shows that he doesn’t fully
recognize her as his daughter when she wants to go to the cinema on her birthday
and he is being hard about it at first. Like he doesn’t want her to meet her siblings
and become a part of the family. He also doesn’t want to take her in when nana died,
so she had to marry Rasheed. He treats her as he does, because his reputation of
wealth and family can’t be damaged by a ‘harami’.
4. Why does Mariam ask her father to take her to the cinema for her fifteenth
birthday present? What does she want?
She asks Jalil, because she wants to meet her siblings and her other side of the
family. She also wants to see where he lives and where he works.
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