Summary Conflict Management
Lecture 1 the nature of conflict management
Chapter 1: Introduction to the Study of Conflict Communication
(Cahn & Abigail, 2014)
As a first step in communicating, the conflicting parties must meet to deal with the issues that divide
them. In so doing, the conflicting parties create or repair channels of communication and thus lay a
foundation for bridging the gap that separates them.
The Nature of Conflict
Interpersonal conflict is a problematic situation with the following four unique characteristics:
1. The conflicting parties are interdependent
occur with people who are important to us and who we expect to continue seeing or
working with in the future.
2. They have the perception that they seek incompatible goals or outcomes or they favor
incompatible means to the same ends
3. The perceived incompatibility has the potential to adversely affect the relationship if not
addressed
4. There is a sense of urgency about the need to resolve the difference
A conflict does not have to be overt. It is likely that when people are first thinking about a conflict,
they may not even say anything about it; rather, they may evade the topic or communicate about it
in ambivalent terms.
The inevitability of conflict principle: when relationships become closer, the conflict becomes
increasingly more likely, hence inevitable. The closer:
• the more issues are likely to occur,
• the more trivial (minor) complaints become significant ones, and
• the more intense your feelings are.
Seven types of emotional, psychological, and material resources that produce satisfaction in long
term romantic relationships:
love—nonverbal expressions of positive regard, warmth, or comfort
• status—verbal expressions of high or low prestige or esteem
• service—labor of one for another
• information—advice, opinions, instructions, or enlightenment
• goods—material items
• money—financial contributions
• shared time—time spent together
lacking? Then more potential for conflict.
Conflict Management
We define conflict management as the communication behavior a person employs based on his or
her analysis of a conflict situation. Conflict resolution, refers to only one alternative in which parties
solve a problem or issue and expect it not to arise again. Conflict management involves alternative
ways of dealing with conflict, including resolution or avoiding it altogether.
,The definition has three important implications:
- Conflict management can become skill, also known as communication competence. When
you learn to communicate effectively in a certain communication we can use this when the
situation calls for it.
- You have choices to make when in a conflict situation such as how to communicate.
- You must analyze it by taking a meta-conflict perspective.
o Meta-conflict perspective means that you can look back on the conflicts you have
experienced, analyze what you did well and what you did poorly, and learn from your
mistakes
According to the linear model of communication communication contains a provision for noise
(interference) and for receiver feedback, so that the receiver could indicate to the message sender
that she or he received the message as intended.
Noise may consist of distractions in the face‐to‐face environment (such as TV, other people, or loud to‐to‐face environment (such as TV, other people, or loud face environment (such as TV, other people, or loud
sounds) or technical difficulties that delete messages via the Internet or cut off contact on a cell
phone. Feedback from others may consist of nonverbal reactions, such as facial cues, body
movements, gestures, tone of voice, or verbal response. For the most part, this model emphasizes
accuracy: Is what was “received” the same meaning as what was “intended or sent”?
More like a conveyor belt
When applied to conflict, the linear model limits our view of interpersonal conflict as something we
do to someone. From a linear point of view, our focus is on the end result, which means getting the
other to change his or her mind or behavior to coincide with our position. But when conflicts arise,
they arise because of the way both people act with respect to one another.
Alternative: transactional model of communication
- emphasizes managing and coordinating instead of end product
- exchange of messages instead of persuading
- not something we do to one another, but with one another
more like dance
Viewing objects, people, events, and social situations as processes means that we understand:
• Processes have stages or phases of development through growth or deterioration.
• They have a history in which a distinctive pattern emerges.
• They consist of continual change over time.
• They have ingredients that interact (affect one another) that may or may not lead to the next
stage (depending on the ingredients).
• At any given point in time and space, they represent some outcome, stage, or state of being
(like a picture or a single frame in a film).
Failing to see a conflict as a process explains why some people are not interested in learning how to
manage it. These people do not take into account the above points: unchanging, no effect of history,
no realization of ingredients.
We can define conflict communication as a process of exchanging verbal and nonverbal messages in
a conflict situation that starts with antecedents, moves through steps, and ends with consequences.
In some cases, conflict situations become cycles because they get bogged down in particular stages
and repeat themselves.
,Process of a successfully resolved conflict:
The prelude to conflict consists of the variables that make conflict possible between those involved:
- Participants
- Relationship and conflict history
- Other interested parties
- The physical and social environment of the conflict situation
Affect the course of the conflict
The triggering event or conflict stimulus is a behavior that the parties in the conflict point to as the
issue, problem, or focal point of the conflict can be different for each party.
The initiation phase or response occurs when the conflict becomes overt.
The differentiation phase or ongoing interaction pattern occurs when the participants use
constructive or destructive strategies and tactics, presenting both sides of the story, moving back and
forth, and escalating and de‐to‐face environment (such as TV, other people, or loud escalating the conflict allows for both parties to explain their
perspective and express their needs.
The resolution phase or outcome occurs when those involved accept some outcome to the conflict
affects the way future conflicts are managed, regardless of outcome cycle.
An unsuccessful conflict is one that becomes diverted at one of the stages. A conflict may begin to
progress through the phases and stop, or it may return to a previous stage when new issues are
introduced and added to the conflict.
, According to researchers, there are at least three ways in which conflicts may escalate and do harm
to a relationship:
The more excited and heated the conflict communication, the more likely the partners are to
disengage from their relationship.
Some patterns of conflict communication (such as appeasing the other rather than engaging
in conflict) are more disastrous to the relationship in the long run even if they appear more
desirable at the beginning.
Certain nonverbal behaviors during conflict communication predict relationship breakups
later.
Some conflicts, although uncomfortable in the short run, may serve the needs of those in the
relationship in the long run, or may even serve others outside the parties’ relationship or society at
large (=productive).
A destructive conflict occurs when the parties do not manage a conflict in a way that is mutually
satisfactory and does harm to their relationship.
- Leads to an increase in: number of issues and people involved, costs to the participants and
intensity of negative feelings
- Escalation not considering options
- Manipulative techniques
A productive conflict occurs when a conflict is kept to the issue and to those involved.
- Reduces costs and negative feelings
- No escalation
- Does not rely on overt power and manipulative techniques
- Flexible
- Taking to account important goals of all parties
Sometimes an emotional outcome (somebody listens to you) is sufficient for a conflict to resolve,
instead of a more factual outcome.
Negative view of conflict: The idea that conflicts are painful occurrences that are personally
threatening and best avoided.
Findings study using metaphors to describe the concept ‘conflict’:
- People who use negative strategies use more negative metaphors and others who are more
passive use metaphors that reflect powerless feelings.
- Not all people choose the same adjectives when describing what conflict means to them.
Positive view of conflict: where the effective conflict manager does not view conflict negatively, but
rather sees opportunities to resolve problems and improve relationships with the people who mean
the most in conflict situations.
- This mindset first step in managing conflicts
o Personal responsibility
o Flexibility
o Recognition that it works no miracle
o Complexity
