Characters
Greg Owen – Brother John died of overdose. Mom lives near Lawson College. Dad was a judge in jail
for fraud and corruption. Greg was kicked out of Lawson college and does home-school to finish
school. Then goes to Stellenbosch university. Username is G – 4ce
Rina Owen – Greg and John’s mom
John Owen – Greg’s Brother – died of overdose adventurist.
Chris Owen – John and Greg’s father. In Kgosi Mam Puru 11 Prison Pretoria Central Prison. Had
Turret Media Group. Candlestick maker
Thomas Jean Lawson – Founder of Lawson College. AKA TJ.
Rebecca Lawson – Thomas Lawson’s trophy wife
Eckardt Wilken/ Xander – dad is a judge who went missing and is believed dead. Dad’s death is
confirmed by Greg Chapter 15 when he messages Xander. His real name is Xander Gericke. But it
was changed. His username is Ekk -o
Dr Alec Pienaar - Lawsons principal (Dok) In Kgosi Mam Puru 11 Prison Pretoria Central Prison. The
butcher.
Joanne Gibbs – secretary at Lawson
Plank – Greg’s friend from Lawson, second year at Stellies while Greg is going onto first year.
Chloe Adams – lives in number 5
Kiana and Lizmari – Chloe’s friends
Lisa – The girl Plank likes.
Dirk Schutte- Lisa’s Dad a policeman
Dr Rian Trollip- Doctor in a photo with Chris Owen. Dr Caught with Child Pornography.
Project Nursery Rhyme – PNR
Dain February – Classmate of Owen
Andre Symington – Mrs Owen’s Boyfriend. Chemical engineer
Nicole – Greg’s ex-girlfriend
Collette – Nicole’s baby
Ayla – Xander’s girlfriend. Long dark brown hair curls at her neck with mysterious eyes. Very pretty.
Dad is South African
Baker – camera man of Xander’s dad’s death. Sebastian Stadler – older, grey haired. grew up
in Uitschotkraal.
,Prologue
Xander speaks in prologue
Chapter 1 – Skreeu ( End January)
Greg Owen is dead. A team pf divers pulled his body out of a canal in Venice. That’s what the
newspapers reported at the time. I was in Venice where the winding canal is like a giant snake and
someone was pulled put the water.
Other people were with us. There were 5 of them. 1 is dead. This is our story.
Our house is Sandhurst was like a place of twilight. No sound. Outside a cell phone rings in a car in
the street. A chef is in the kitchen. I play loud music purposely to break the silence.
A look into the future
When you come up to the house, there is always a heavy feeling that lies on you like a curled up
snake.
That’s how it began when we went to the house in the middle of matric, next to Lawson College.
That was a year and a half ago. Time had a different meaning then. Time was gloomy.
In the past, when you struggle or stamped at the end of the day in court, to wonder how you got
there.
Business associates of my father were there. I made my self scarce. Always busy, as if they were
worried.
One unlikely person arrived at our house with flowers in their hand. Let me know if there is anything
that you need Mrs Owen.
Thomas Lawsons grandfather felt as if he owed my dad a debt.
Now that school is over the Doc and my dad’s court case is in the media. There is still a depressing
feeling in the house. That was the evening that I realised it was the last time I would like in my bed.
Tomorrow is the time for a new beginning. The one or other time a person must move forward. That
is life. Breathe out slowly.
My eyes go to the wall where there is a picture of Conrad Botes (a surgeon). It’s from the book
“Temptation to exist” A self-portrait that I don’t understand but can look at it forever. My mom
bought it cos she knew I liked the hard brush art.
Further back stands boxes and cases that are packed to go to Stellenbosch, where I am going to live.
I must sleep, its midnight.
With my eyes closed, the voice inside my head says, “The man who threw his dad to the wolves” It is
a pain in my chest. You can leave the house, but your weakness will go with you.
,Without the past shadows, I turn over. Still can’t sleep. Eventually I get out of bed and go to the
bathroom. The light becomes brighter when I get inside. I put a steam of water in my hand and put
it on my face and see how it shines on my skin.
My face has changed. I’m not the same matric lighty I was in Lawson College. My face is more
angular. Something sadder in my face. A bitterness in the way my lips pull.
People learn from the races what you miss out on. I remember a rugby coach said a rugby match
teaches that life is unfair. Where I am now and how I got here. It’s not how my life is meant to be.
With that grinding thought I go to my brother John’s room.
For a minute I want to knock and hope he answer. “Come in if you have pants on,” he always called, I
laugh a bit before I go into the room and turn on the light. A soft glow fills the room, and more
memories fill my head. The bed is made, curtains closed. All his things the same as when he was
alive. My mom keeps it like that. That’s how I like it too. Almost a memorial to my brother.
To keep the memories alive in me, I cling to the times we were together. Like when we went Bungee
jumping at the Soweto towers, Bloukrans, and Moses Mabida stadium. John loved adrenaline
rushes. Why are we doing this I asked at the stadium platform as we looked out. John was already in
the harness. The sea wind made our hair blow and pulled our shirts to us.
John answered, “For the fall, for the fear” and he jumped.
The line was attached to him like an umbilical cord as he swung from the massive structure above
him. John threw his arms open and screamed, “For the fall, for the fear”.
He dragged me to every adventure, bungee, white water rafting in the Orange River. With all the
adrenalin it tested the limit of life. Those limits were reached.
But it was not one of those dangerous sports, but in a bottle of pills. That is how he died.
My dad screamed, “My Gd john!” when we found him. That would not bring him back, even though
mom pleased on the way to the hospital.
At the emergency room, the doors of the ambulance opened slowly which brough the news…. It was
over. Mom got out the car in a haze/ fog went to the ambulance. My dad and I sat still in the car for
a moment. Dad said something that shocked me. I could never tell anyone else, not even my mom.
Now it is years later and I’m standing in John’s room.
Blonde hair and blue eyes and a smile that the girl’s loved. Everything in place where I will remember
him. It becomes a shadow before it is long forgotten.
The Mexicans believe that people have 3 deaths. 1 when you close your eyes finally. 1 when you are
buried and 1 when no one remembers you. You had 2 deaths so far, I say to him as I sit on his bed
where we found the bottle of pills as so now you have one more death left.
“ Aren’t you sleeping?” my mom asks at the door. She has a silk gown on and is barefoot. No effort
to hide the tiredness on her face.
“Some of my sins keeping me awake” I joke.
His mouth muscles twitch and she comes into the room slowly like she is walking on holy ground.
She looks at a photo frame, a medal, and an autographed rugby ball from the Lawson College
Museum.
, Sometimes, it is like I can still fell John in the room, like I felt him in my body before he was born. A
mom doesn’t forget how her children felt in her body. John was the restless one. Like he was
planning on playing a sport in her tummy.
You were calmer, Greg. A thinker. A dreamer, I thought in those days. Your foot was kicking my heart
as if you were in distress and you wanted to get out, I knew you would be a rebel.
My mom shakes her head as if he is listening for Johns voice that doesn’t come. Then she folds her
arms around her body as if she is suddenly cold (comfort) If a person loses a child, it is like they land
in the depths of the sea where you drown on your own. No one can come and save you, strangely
you don’t want anyone to come and save you. You just look for your child. That’s all. I don’t know
what to say to my mother. Just like I don’t know what it is like to lose a child. And she doesn’t know
what it feels like to lose a brother. Aren’t we all drowning in the same place? What will mom do
when I am away? Certainly, I must go one with my life. There is a vulnerability in the sagging of her
shoulders, a rawness in her voice.
Do you know what I did after John’s death? While you were at Lawsons college, and dad was on his
business trip. I was trapped in this house. I shake my head, I waited for all the workers to leave at
night, then I closed all the windows and the doors, and I screamed and screamed and screamed.
The confession shakes me. Her mouth curls nervously. Then comes another confession from her that
underlines her desperation. Everyone that I love has been taken away from me. It looks like she has
difficulty keeping her emotions.
I stand up and put my arms around her and hold her to me. I ask if she is ok. No answer. I put my
hands on her face and stare at her. Her mouth puckers, she kisses my hand. In silence I watch her
walk away, stuck in my memory is her in the lounge or the bedroom. He hands balled up in fists,
eyes squinting, mouth open. Inside me I hear her scream and the raw cries go echo in the empty
rooms.
Chapter 2 – Vertrek – Leaving (end January)
With a cap on the head and uncomplicated clothing on, I take the boxes to the car. A new BMW
sport model bought out my trust fund. 2 bags later and some lose items and of coursed my laptop
bag. Everything fit nicely in the car. As an afterthought, I go back and fetch the Conrad Botes painting
off the wall. It will look good in my new place.
On my way, I see the photo of join at the entrance hall. I put the picture away and get my phone to
take a photo of the picture. Onto the third death. Cheers Greg, I hear from the steps above me.
Clear and certain I hear John’s saying goodbye. I shake my head but there is nobody there,
While I am standing there wondering, mom comes out of the study. Today she is stylishly dressed.
Glamourous and perfect. The emotional woman not the one who had to fill the silence with
screams. We all hide parts of ourselves from others. Mom looks at the photo on my cell phone.
Everything that lies ahead of you Greg, was not meant for your brother. Like yesterday, her words
stop me. I will do the studying for all of us. I am not only talking about university, Greg. Her eyes rest
on me. You will walk paths that your brother never could follow. How lucky for you. How sad and
sorry for you. The sadness is welling up inside me. Where is that bullet proof vest when you need it?
I look away cos it is harder to shoe my emotions to other people. The road I long I must go. I wave.
Do you have everything? She asks as she walks outside with me. I gesture to the full car. I hope so.
